My Thunderstorm

You were caught inside my thunderstorm 
Twisted, nearly broke your arm 
Hail was breaking all your armor down 
Lightning emblazoned on me like a crown
You said I terrified you like a demon
As if I was the goddess of a pagan heathen
I told you dance
Dance in the rain
You said you felt the iron of my hellish gaze
I told you run
Then run away
You said my lightning had left you blind in a daze
You were caught inside my thunderstorm
Battered, you couldn't perform
Thunder shattered all your walls down
I was wreathed by a lightning crown
You called me evil- I'm a demon
I said you followed no such religion
I told you dance
Dance in the rain
You said you couldn't bear the sting of my thunderous ways
I told you run
Just run away
You said I was lightning and haunted all your days
So just run
Run away
My thunderstorm is building power in a craze
And I will dance
Dance in my rain
My lightning crown upon my head I will raise
Trapped inside my thunderstorm
Twisted, shattered, in my final form

by: Elizabeth Azpurua

The Hell of Memory

Hail the hell on the waters
Hail the waves
and the towers
But her eyes like ice
Topaz puddles her price
Hail the illusions on hills
Hail the rains
and the chills
Well her eyes were like moss
Losing her was such a loss
Bright light and pain
and walls without a name
Can't see through rain
and I've nowhere left to claim
I miss the wild forests
I miss their tangled hair
I miss the one who watched us
Our guard was passing fair
Hail the hell in the stormy sky
Hail the thunder
and hasten the lie
Hail the crashing of the sea
Hail the waves
and wait it out with me
Because I miss eyes like sapphires
Because I miss walls of stone
Because illusions make raging fires
That burnt away what I had known
Hail the hell of memory
Hail the unknown

By: Elizabeth Azpurua

Not Alone

We're all backed into corners, clothes caught on nails
in loose floor boards, strength failed, sick with ails
There are shadows beneath us and dark figures ahead
Words spent in music that clatters inside our head
We're trying to find someone whose demons can play
well with our own so we can all come as we may
into the sunlight, full sight, nothing to hide
no need to lock doors, build walls; confide
and tell them the truth, tell them the past, the pain
let their dark moments dance with our own in rain
but we're sitting in corners with our knees in our chests
baring our scars to the room like they are our crests
saying "this is war, whose side are you on?"
telling the shadows like they haven't won
Loads of moments, troubles, high - dirty hair falling out
you scraped the bottom, your faith swallowed in doubt
We're all seeking for someone who has demons like our own
who can pull out the weeds from our gardens overgrown
and tear down our walls and unlock our doors; set free
with full sunlight, truth blaring, a moment we can be
ourselves - free, able to stand and face the day knowing
someone like us is out facing the day, too, showing
we're not alone.

Midnight Spider

"Midnight Clarity"

Why does it seem clarity is an after midnight thing
where you're forced to face the fact
the one you want doesn't want you back,
and the one you need you just don't want?
You're dodging bullets like an elephant
and you're feeling pain you let yourself feel
by chasing things that just weren't real.
There are no midnight unicorns,
just wishes dressed as horses wearing horns

9/24/13

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"Spider In The Rain"

Why does it seem I'm hateful and I'm wasted on you now?
You say I'm such a wrong one, tell me oh, tell me how
because I see it like this: I been begging on these knees
for some porridge or a pot of money making beans
and I need some institution that can fix my troubled mind
oh, tell me why you think I've been unkind?
Lately, I been scrambling like a spider in the rain
hurrying to save my web and stop all my pain
You think I am hateful and I am the mean one
but you are not offering me anything now, hun
So tell me I am the wrong one when I'm barely here
hanging on by a single thread caught inside of fear
I need a magic bush to grant me daily bread
and a genie bottle love, to save me from my dread
I need an institution to fix my troubled mind
but you are telling me I am never kind
I been down and I been hurt and scared
With my luck, how would you have faired?
I been scrambling like a spider in the rain
tangled, caught, and out of luck; insane

9/25/13

You Can't Have Me Crawling

"Silent Crawling"

I feel like rocks have been tied to my toes
and my shoes are full of lead
and my eyes are full of holes
I feel like I been draggin' myself across the ground
for too long now
and I can't make a sound
Should I be like the rubble left behind?
Should I be like a tree planted firm,
never moving, always stern?
I am sifting my fingers through the dirt
for a rope to pull me out
but no, no, never now
I feel like weights have been tied to my eyes
closing them tight to see
and I am blinded from the light
That might have led me to my tunnel's end
but I have found
I've been draggin' me too long now
Should I be like the towers crashed behind me?
Should I be like the rain falling,
drenching, drowning everything?
I am clenching my fists in dirt unable to find
that rope to pull me out
and save my life
I can't get ahead, and I stay behind, and why?
Because these weights upon me won't let me try
and I have been draggin' myself for far too long
without a rope to help me, I am just not strong
So tell me....should I be like the rubble left behind?
Should I be like a tree planted firm,
never moving, always stern?
Should I be like the towers crashed behind me?
Should I be like the rain falling,
drenching, drowning everything?
But I'm here silent and crawling

9/18/13


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"You Can't Have Me"

you want my body, Sir
and nothing more
you do not want my soul for sure

you want to feel me, Sir
because of my allure
for your lust there is no cure

but you do not want me to speak
don't want my soul, or me to think
you do not want my sharp mind
you only want me for my behind

thank you kindly, Sir
I am worth more
you can keep your pants on for sure

you can't have me, Sir
forget about my allure
I will offer you no cure

I can't be silenced or shut up
don't dare call me Buttercup
or Mami, or Baby, or Woman, or Doll
do not text, email, or call
do not show up at my door
don't dare treat me like a whore
I am worth so much more
you can't have me, Sir

9/12/13

No More Anymore

     my love was - sought for
       like a lover but done for
     I am unwitting and I am sore
but who says, oh who says more?

 should she linger?, no - she shan't now
       does his finger hold the power now?
       did the dam break the new day?
oh, come again, oh come what may

E'r the dawning comes like cold rain
      awash our souls in the bitter pain
  does it hurt now? something says yes
and burns the soul as it aches the chest

           my love was - just a wish
like I spent time awaiting a wish
  to be born from the edge of this
        in an escaping sigh or a kiss

    shall they linger?, no - they should not
let them wander or lost or become forgot
like a day, or dawn, or a ray, or gone -
 said the silence, said the silent dawn
    in a whimper, or a whisper, or a song
    she said come what may, come along
Oh, be still, oh unsure, but tarry on
      and wait for the rain to be gone
      linger just enough 'til the dawn

      my love was - silence now
    to be burnt in my flesh how?
Like a live wire, a lightning bolt of pain
should I let it mark and scar and remain?
     I am unwitting and I am sore
  and I do not want this anymore

           no,
I cannot want it at all  - no, no more
           no, I cannot want it anymore

9/7/13

Storm Cloud

I’m a storm cloud not a storm drain

Not a drizzle but a heavy rain; you better start seeing things for how they really are

You can talk sharp, hurricane, splinter on the words pouring out in pain

But the lessons really are inside of the insane, like an alabaster mystery without a proper name

They are mask wearing, fast sharing, manipulative snakes, like devils in the desert they are feeding you their taste

In acrid ceremonies living on the inside of your skull, contemplate the betterment and live for something more

She has a forked tongue, single eye, one that wanders, one that lies, listen to the poison dripping from her voice

It’s a velvet kind of sound and leaves you with one choice

Take the heat, take the sand, take what you deserve, you know you can, and says you don’t deserve a forest, just a fake hallucinated oasis

Darling, I’m a storm cloud not a storm drain

I do not drizzle when I rain, and you must be certain I know what they really are

Single serpents in the ground feeding liars until they starve, insane, ponder on the pain

Leave your lessons at the door and make yourself a fake history without a proper name

They are mask wearing, fast sharing, manipulative snakes, like devils in the desert with only one thing to taste

Acrid ceremonies featuring the innocent, contemplate the betterment and hurry shut your door

Foolish one, closed your eyes, seal the whispers of your demise, they will slowly poison and leave you with no choice

In velvet tongues they have one voice

Coated in heat, and in sand, what you deserve you understand, and so you know you deserve a forest but are getting just a fake oasis

I am a storm cloud, not a storm drain; I am nearly like a hurricane

I don’t play around with words and lies

I do not lead you to demise

But they do

 

8/11/13

Wicked Cupid

You're like lightning
I can only see
when the storms come
You're like lightning
I can't touch
or I'll be done
You're a bright light in a streak
across my grey sky
and your light could make me weak
if you came nigh
So, shoot me down
and strike me dead
and charge my body
from feet to head
Oh, just shoot me down
and strike me dead
like a wicked Cupid

You're like lightning
Brief and quick
you come and go
You're like lightning
you bring the rain
and I won't know
You'll be a light swift across my sky
in burning heat
Never know when you'll come nigh
my own defeat
You'll shoot me down
and strike me dead
and charge my body
from feet to head
Oh, shoot me down
and strike me dead
like a wicked Cupid

Damage

Landslides have covered the pavement
and new dawn has dawned with grief
The rains fell and washed all of us away
and where shall come our relief?
Earth shattering shaking around us
and trees have forsaken their roots
The windows have broken on this ground
and left crushed under our boots
The strong winds have torn us asunder
and the damage left in their wake
caused all the children and mothers to grieve
and cry out for heaven's sake
Oh, where do the pieces fit in the puzzle?
Where is the light at the end of the tunnel?
Who is the cause and who is the relief?
and tell me what is the depth of their grief?
The rubble is marked by what used to be
and the signs are all facing down
So grab hold of your loved ones and hold them close
and wave goodbye to your town
Landslides have covered the pavement
and the morning is harsh in the light
The floods have washed everything away
and the wind had ravished all night
Earth shattering shaking and broken
and the branches have made you a map
to lead you on to a long weary road
of which there's no turning back

by: elizabeth a.

Strange Halloween Salt

"Strange Wayfarer of Autumn"

Shave off your odd bits and break down your walls
but I can't carry the weight of your wounds anymore
and out on the foggy road strewn in autumn leaves
I'll let all the heavy burdens fall off of me
and I will walk away into the sunset knowing that
winter is coming and I am too weak
I can't hold you back
I will fasten wings for you
but they might look like those of a bat
and if someone should think you a demon
just know, I never wanted that
but I am a wayfarer and I am strange
and the woods were always my home
and after I broke down all your barriers
I still felt so very alone
I can't carry the weight of your wounds anymore
and this road is getting steep
I'll let the burdens all fall off of me
and climb this mountain peak
Winter is coming after these reds all fade
and I'm to weak and still too afraid
but I will fasten you wings I'll make
and I hope you won't scare anybody away
but I must walk on my way now
for the fog has settled on me
and this Autumn road is strange like me
but someday you'll fly back and lift me away....
...for out of your wounds I fastened those wings


10/2/12

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"Here Comes Halloween"

Black roses and red leaves
and orange carved faces
with cobwebbed spider sleeves
and wrought iron fences
Darkness and harvest moons
with bats lining windows
Enchanting haunted tunes
and lanterns in rows
Sheets making ghosts
and painted ghoulish faces
and scarecrows on posts
and creepy haunting places
There goes a witch on by
Here comes a goblin in green
Did you hear a banshee cry?
Here comes Halloween

9/29/12

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"Drink before the Salt"

I can't lead you to the water
and I can't make you drink
but I can feed you salt
and take you to the brink
and then when you are craving
something to quench your thirst
I will bring the rain down
so you won't think you're cursed
and drink, drink, drink, drink up darling
the water's falling
and it's time to be healed
so drink, drink, drink, drink darling
or I will bury your bones in salted earth

10/1/12

Weeds Grow Underfoot

"Grow"

have I fallen down?
and drug beneath the earth, my soul is crawling
crawling towards you
and the rubble settles
and on me, thick, layered dust; I'm doomed
but still, I crawl towards you
and I dig my way out, and up and out
and greeting me
is sun
and the light is all and all I know is
you're the one
I'd fallen down
and learned beneath the earth, my soul is yearning
yearning only for you
and when this settles
the dust on me, thick, and heavy; I was doomed
until I learned to crawl to you
and I dug my way out, and up and out
and greeting me
is sun
and the light is all and all I know is
you're the one
you're the one
to help me.......grow

9/6/12

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"Weeds"

and thou art like a high walled garden
  where inside the weeds have grown
and I am like the bird that visits
  unable to tend, or mend, or sow
and when the rains come I must seek shelter
  and when the snow falls I must be warm
but when your flowers bloom I am here
and when your flowers die I am here
  and what they call weeds, I call home

9/5/12

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"Underfoot"

in tiny threads, stories were hidden
and then placed under the bed
in a rug
and those tiny threads lay unbidden
screaming truth for your head
in your dreams
and woven like cathedrals
in the carpet
was the truth you refused to think
and underfoot you left it
and it surfaced in your dreams
in tiny threads, it lay seeking
and under your bed
the truth
and those tiny threads speaking
screaming truth for your head
to prove
and woven like cathedrals
in the carpet
was the reason you won't think
and underfoot you left them
until they battled in your dreams

9/6/12

Artist and Watercolor

"If I were an Artist"

If I were a sculptor I'd carve you in stone
and chisel you out a mouth
and place you in my home
and you'd stare back at me
and you'd smile just for me
and I'd forever be lucky to see
you carved happy
If I were a painter I'd paint you on canvas
and color you like the spring
and place you in my home
where you'd stare back at me
and you'd smile just for me
and I'd forever get to see
a painting of happy
If I were a poet I'd write a poem for you
and tell the world what I love
and place you in me home
and capture in words the feeling of you smiling
and tell them what it means when you smile for me
and I'd capture forever in words that I'm happy
a poem of happy
I'd write just for you
Oh, if I were an artist, I'd be able to keep
forever the memory of you happy with me

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"Autumn Watercolor Golds"

At the dawn on the road I await it
the fog to settle and sit
and the autumn rains to come
and wet the leaves like watercolor golds
I await the deepest reds and
I want to number the oranges
and capture in colors
while wearing my coat
the feeling of Autumn and
what I love most
and run, run, run, run, run
in the fog and the autumn rains
and watch the world become
watercolor golds
and when I stop and stare
I want to see standing there
a home waiting to welcome me

It is what it is.......

My life becomes endless counting coins
and catching rain
and I have a vendetta against spiders playing violins
There's alarms that sound from time to time
and some days there are no lights
but I've got poetry
and faith
My life becomes endless marking days down
and watching bills mound
like mountains of grief
but when the sky cries I rejoice
and when time flies
I rejoice
and when days are pretty I feel like I should sing
I may sleep wrapped up tight
and hope insomnia stays gone
I might dream restless dreams about things that need to be done
but when I rise each day I have a warm place to stay
and some days I just cannot ask for more
My life becomes a battle with the way I'd like it to be
and how it remains
bring the rains
and better days to me
My pest control man texts me like a friend
and my job says I'm better again
and my friends drop like flies in the heat
My dreams fall through slippery hands while I dream of distant lands
but it's OK because I have a roof over my head
I might be penniless in the rain, but hell, at least I have a shower
and hell, at least I have the power to say
I can be happy anyway
I may not have those who said they'd stay here but I have nothing left to fear
because nothing can hurt me now I know
I am like the child who says to the sun
"it is what is is, so make it so"
I wake each day and greet the day and go on and hope for even better days
but for now, I am here, and here is home

Rain, stone, ashes and a flag for love

The rain is falling on the roof here
and I alone
not thinking clear
wish simply to
be held be you
but I do fear
a heart of stone
inside your chest; if I come near

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"Ashes"

I am like spectre haunting these walls within
My whole perception seems so very grim
I was hoping for an unbroken heart
This never seems to be my way
It's always ashes
I am choking on the wishes spilling from my lips
Thinking of what might have happened with a kiss
I am realizing broken hearts kill
This is the way of things
It's always ashes
I am wandering lost inside like I'm floating
I can't grasp the life without hurting
I see my broken heart behind my eyes
There is never a chance for me
It's always ashes

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"Fly A Flag of Love"

Photographs can't bring it back
Can't make it right
Can't bring the glad
So I will hold high aloft
This flag for you
To say I love
I will march the road alone
Until you come back home
I will, banner in hand, sing your name
and carry photographs each day
I can't feel the joy like I did
Or feel the glad things, but
I will fly a flag for you
To say I love
I will walk the road on my own
Until you come back home
I will, banner in hand, sing your name
and I hope you'll do the same

By Elizabeth Azpurua

You Are...

reckless
radiant
you are divine
but you are the error
and the right
stubborn
and hopeless
you are the grace
and the martyr
and the error
transcendent
marked my soul
prideful
and never whole
you are divine
but the error
and the right
you are the wish
the wrong
and the relief
the echo
and mirror
the prayer
and the belief
you are the wisdom
you are the pain
the majesty
and healing rain
you are the debtor
the disease
the healing
and the ease
you are the magic
and the marveling
you are simple
and still
and yet all encompassing
you are the reason
you're divine
and you are all and yet
so far behind
you are the way
the stumbling block
you are the day
that rises and the
end of the clock
you are the light
and you are the tunnel
the music
the rhyme and
the thunder
you are the spacious
and the descending
the closed and
transcending
you are divine
the marvel
the masterpiece
benevolence
and beauty
you are quick
and the patient
the error
and the right
you are all that is wrong
and wicked
and everything done right
you are the wishful
the wonder
and the way
you are divine
reckless
radiant
hopeless
and with time
gracious and
magnificent
you're the divine
you are echo
and mirror
and master
and life
you are the reason
for all the madness
in my life

Is the Bird Elizabeth?

"Elizabeth"

Bashful, was a face I knew not
I can't place my illusions
of being superior
I cared not, haughty and high handed
I was branded with a grief
born of lies
I would walk on by and glance their way
not caring who's faces I passed
There was nothing to stop me or make me stay
I would not look around
I was ornery
Timid, never a trait of mine
I would take on the world like a General
These illusions I held to were mine
to make me stronger
Yet here you are, stripped me bare in a word
You opened your mouth
to my knees, from that sound I heard
Mister, you have nerve, to bring me down
You have nerve to stop me
Who are you with your hot tempered charm?
I am no fool, you see
Sultry, these eyes of mine have captivated
I led them along like little toys
I did not care, for my illusions held me aloft
but then, you stripped me bare
You laid me out like all I was not
Showed me how weak my armor was
My little friend, called vengeance, could not touch you
you're unstoppable
I hated the fact you made me weak
I hated this vulnerable side of me
How can a man stop me with a glance
and let me know he sees right through me?
Stupid boy, I've no time for your charades
I am not a game playing girl
And yet you crook your finger then to tell me where I erred
and I am annoyed by your stance
So, I primp my hair, and I bat these eyes
I wear my pearls but try in vain
You glance my way, and I might as well be wearing
the garb of a little child
in fairy pink and glittered toes
I do not feel powerful or sophisticated
I feel quite bashful and shy
Oh, why, oh why, am I suddenly so weak in your gaze?
What have you done to me?
Then, I am transformed
Beneath your eyes I am more than I could ever be
No walls, no airs, no facades to hide behind
I am all I am and more and that is fine
You Mister, you're a Master of me
You call the shots with your finger crooked
You make me see I am powerful, by being vulnerable and being
all of me, splendid me
I am ever greater, stronger and beautiful underneath your glance and
in your words
your uttered word
that word that changes how I look at me
The word, the word, the word....is....

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"Death of a Bird"

Little bird on the pavement is dying slowly
You see her there and think to care too slowly
You figure nothing can help and why dirty your hands?
You leave that little bird there and say it's out of your hands
So, she lays alone and watches the leaves fall
So, she lays alone and watches the rain fall
She is cold and her feathers are drenched
She is shaking and in fear she is drenched
How you left her to die is so cruel and wrong
I know you'll never admit that you're wrong
She is just a bird you say just a dead bird now
Yet she died a slow death; how does it feel now?
Little bird on the pavement is a dead little thing
You had walked right on by this tragic thing
Her feathers are fading to fragile bones
Hollow, broken, kicked aside bones
You walked on by
You walked on by

By Elizabeth Azpurua

I miss a lot lately....

"I Miss it All"

I miss those mornings, crisp and early
and the dew
I miss the green grass and the autumn leaves
and I miss you
I miss the smells of breakfast cooking
and the smell of pages turning
and the sounds of birds chirping
and the feel of kitty fur
I miss the laughter and I recall
all the tears and how they'd fall
I miss the drive and I miss the road
I miss the way it winded and wove
I miss the puddles, creeks, and all the scenes
like the clouds and blooming flowers of spring
I miss the summer heat and whirling fans
I miss the smell of horses and hay
I miss it all
It all, it all, it all
What more can I say?
I miss the youthfulness and the learning
the music, I'm still yearning
I miss the cardinals and the hummingbirds
I miss it all, have you heard?
I miss the rain how it fell like a waterfall
I miss the snow how it came like a wonderland
I miss the dogs and I miss the cat''s call
I miss the warmth and I don't understand
I miss those times and I don't know why they've gone
Did I do something wrong?
I miss the way I smiled and the way I let go
I missed the stories and how I'd always know
I guess at times life must change it seems
Why did it change at all?
I miss it all, it all, it all
I do, indeed

Turtle Dove Singing of a Hopeless Love

Partridge in the pear tree, tell me, tell me
Where has Cardinal gone?
Will he come back soon, I wonder?
Will his sojourn be long?
Sometimes birds have to fly away during winter
Maybe this place is too cold?
Will you wait here with me, Partridge?
I need someone to hold
I am just a turtle dove, waiting on the rain
but I fear the snow will come before I can say
"Spring is a new day, hello, hello Spring"
but I can't sing that welcoming song when the snow is on the way
Perhaps, I'll sing alone
Perhaps you'll leave me too
Cardinal has gone far away
and I don't know what to do
I have a nest to keep and I have a song to sing
the mourning song of wintertime
I am just a turtle dove singing of a hopeless love
and you're stuck in that pear tree
Do you, do you think it'll be OK come spring?
Do you, do you think I'll have a welcoming song to sing?
I am hoping for the rain...but there's snow on the way
Partridge, my feathered friend, how shall we weather on?
I am still singing a forgotten lonesome song
Do you think Cardinal will return to these trees?
I am hoping winter will somehow soon leave
I am just a turtle dove singing of a hopeless love
and you're just a partridge in a tree
Cardinal is a striking bird and he's flown from you and me
But maybe he'll return once I sing to welcome spring

by Elizabeth Azpurua