Saturday, July 24, 2010

If I Could Only Sing a Gold Wish of Home


i wish i could wrap you around me like a sweater
sit beside you in the rain
lay beside you with no pain
i wish
i wish i could kiss you between your eye brows
walk beside you as i sing
make you feel like a king
i wish
i wish i could make you see how beautiful you are
hide away beneath the trees
kiss in the grass on our knees
i wish
i wish i could make you linger here forever and a day
sleep in cotton with no stress
know that i'll never love you less
i wish
i wish that you could see what this could be somehow
sharing thoughts and emotions together
writing our own version of forever
i wish, i wish, i do



Red, ribbons, orange and gold
pale, palest pink
safe in the warmth
inside grey and greens abounding grace
and feeding off of nothing
leave this place
waves of wonder bringing salt kissed
stones to my footsteps
follow me and like a flame
i'm leading you
risk it on the concrete
and leave it on the road
bask inside the silence which is gold
ivory and olive and intertwining grace
fiery and seductive and
a story on the way
red, ribbons, orange and fleeting
like running in gold fields again
and sitting lonesome sorry
on a rock i cannot bend
pale, palest pink
and leave the deeper hue beside
and ask the stars to gather
tell the future of the light
darker than the depths of the ocean
and brighter than the sun
further than mountains travel
and wither they go is
flashes of metal and glass
and airborne in the clouds
settle back down
and come around, around
settle back down
whispered sound
through your thoughts like gold



the irony, the epiphany that came
the subtle hushed tones
of a whispering dame
light the cornerstone
and place it where it goes
and build a home
and build a home
the imagery, the symphony of truth
the barest whisperings aloud
and portraying youth
fill the walls all around
and feel the movement sold
and claim this home
and claim this home


"If I Could Only Sing"

she never had the music quite right
sang off key in words we never knew
and i was singing like a skylark
like i could only sing...
and still the wind took the song from me
poetry, poetry, poetry
and i not a reason why, nor a rhyme
quite right
and so it goes the poems i never knew
are the patterns sewn away just for you
if i could only sing...
without the wind stealing words from me


"If I Could Only Sing a Gold Wish of Home"

If I could only sing a gold wish of home
I'd sing like the words would never fail
and the voice escaping me would paint the dingiest of grey
in golden warmth to light your way home
If I could ever sing a gold wish of home
I'd sing forever louder than the last song
and the music I would make would light this sorry roof
and the golden beams would guide you back home
I wish I could sing in golden beams of home

All By Elizabeth Azpurua 7/24/10

Monday, July 19, 2010

Beautiful? Happiness?

"Happy Charade"
you weren't happy, were you?
but you put that stupid face paint on
wrote smiling faces on your arms
and gave yourself fake eyelashes
curled your red ribboned hair
and spoke in fancy dialects
so people would want to be close to you
and hear your fake accents
i knew the truth behind the charade
and knew the real you since you were a boy
you can claim in all your glitter paints
but I've seen the truth before
you weren't happy, and i know
and you'll make them believe it was so
but in all you acting you forgot
who was the one who made the clothes
you're wearing?
who watched you break the mirrors?
who watched you speak in shivers?
who held your hand as you laid in your own grief?
i know beneath your starry eye lids and under
those flowers on your cheeks
is a boy who played the happy one was he
but you never were
and i know you weren't
so get the stupid act out of the way
it's ok
it's ok
it's ok



"Deep Beauty"

she has eyes like pond water
sort of like dirty shoes
and maybe lettuce that sat too long outside
she has hair like hay bails
like saw dust spun in strands
and horses may all follow her like she offers dinner
she walks like she owns half the world
and like her toes are golden
like the carpet beneath her is red instead of grey
her nails are brittle, face unclean
and her thoughts like ash
burned hopelessly down to cinders of nothing
she preaches peace and speaks in cruelty
cautions against lies but lacks all honesty
burns down the witches after calling them hers
and shouts out at God after denying His words
she was the princess who begged saving
so she could drown her prince
and the moat is still holding his body captive
her lips are the underbelly of war ships
and the aftermath of explosions
is left marking her tongue like a branded truth
some call her beautiful
but her beauty runs deep


By Elizabeth Azpurua

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Moonlight Masquerade

I was the masquerade, my dear
the frills, feathers and gems, my dear
I was the music and the laughter and joy
and I was the smile on a face too coy
the glee in their hearts dancing in swirls
with a finger wrapped round the ends of my curls
I was the parade through the middle that night
the dance throughout beneath moon's light
I was the lips that smiled in perfection
the last inch of the floor filled with inspiration
I was the masquerade, my dear
the dance planned for chances, my dear
The masks and the hidden faces of youth
the concealment in this dance lacking truth
I was the music and the laughter and joy
and I was the smile on a face too coy
I made the glee in their hearts dancing in swirls
with a finger wrapped round the ends of my curls
the charade that ended at exactly midnight
when the slippers all fell beneath the moon's light

One Last Balloon (explicit)


"One Last Balloon"

If I poke at the wounds, am I a bitch?
I insist that you reclaim your weary heart now
If I turn away and slip on my mask
does that make me an accessory to your destruction
or am I just a coward here?
It's not the way I had planned this party to end
The final number was bloody with black letters
in the shapes of angry words on the walls
and I should say it's my fault
for inviting you
But I thought the cake would be enough to
cease your hunger
So I let it go and grab the salt and say "come here"
rub inside those scars, get the message now
and hope my signal becomes clear
and I know I'm wrong for it
turning a blind eye behind grey feathers
and I'll close my eyes too
and pretend I never knew what to do about this
My party was a wreck
and I burned all the wrapped up gifts
popped the balloons and painted the walls a fresh
crisp white
Then I rolled out the red carpet and told the kids
to come and play
while I counted individual salt grains
wearing a mask of grey
and holding one last balloon
singing stupid songs wearing cheap perfume
take your silly heart and the cake I made for you and
eat it all
I've got salt to count
and a carpet cleaner to call

By Elizabeth Azpurua

Friday, July 9, 2010

West St.

"West St."

this is abysmal really
and i haven't a clue how to cope
there's no handbook you see
nor a map of pitfalls
it's all posters with arrows
pointing in opposite directions
and a little man saying
follow me
there's no hope in his eyes
and he's an evil way about him
and i presume he's trying
to destroy me now
i can't wait forever at this
someone better give me a sign
that says where west is
i think i'm supposed to go there
that's what i was told once
and who knows where west is?
probably far behind me
marked by some pebble
too small to see


Monday, July 5, 2010

Bring Him the Sun

"Bring Him the Sun"

He was all quiet in his pain
and I could hear it
from his soul
He was all shelterd by his frame
his body breaking
and unwhole
and they were all laughing in the corners
as he gave his final speech
when they'll all close the shutters
and his eyes will never reach
the sun

He was all whispers through his mouth
and I could feel the pain
from his lips
His hopes and dreams were leaving to the south
and I could see the drain
put upon him
and they were taking trains to the north
as he waved his final goodbye
well they never saw his worth
nor heard that solemn lonely cry
for the sun

So bring him the sun and let it shine
Somebody tell that boy he will be fine, he will be fine
and don't you let them shut the door on his future
and his life
and keep those damned windows open
he needs to see the light
of the sun

He was all choked sobs in the night
and I could feel his pain
through the walls
Dreaming of the world bathed in bright
take away all the shame
and hear his calls
but they were busy laughing in their joys
as he was trying to cope inside
and every little moment passed behind their noise
was the longing to open his arms wide
to the sun

So bring him the sun and let it shine
Somebody tell that boy he will be fine, he will be fine
and I won't let them shut the door on his future
or his life
I'll keep those damned windows open
he needs to see the light
of the sun
I'll bring him the sun

So he'll never curl into the darkness there
And he'll never whisper prayers to the air
His voice can ring out across the brightest sky
And I'll not let that wave be his final goodbye
So he'll never double over sobbing grief
As his body shakes alone grasping his knees
I'll be the one to open windows on his soul
And take his fragile wounds and make him whole

So bring him the sun and let it shine
Somebody tell that boy he will be fine, he will be fine
and I won't let them shut the door on his future
or his life
I'll keep those damned windows open
he needs to see the light
of the sun
I'll bring him the sun
Yes I said I'll bring him the sun
I'm here to help him reach towards the sun
Somebody help the boy feel the sun
Save him and we'll bring him the sun

By: Elizabeth Azpurua

I Gave it Away, Got Silence and I'm So Wrong and Far Away

i wanted to give it to you once - many a time i would have, but you never came. never took it. never asked. i wanted to see you. to touch you. to ask you how your life has been. you never showed up. so i gave it away.
but then he reduced it to pieces - like a broken window. he shattered it. and then he felt bad, so he swept it into a pile. i almost forgave him. but then he opened the door and the wind came and the pile blew away and all over everything. i would have given it to you. but you never asked. i listened to your voice and saw your smile and tried to get you to see me. you didn't. i called for you - loudly, like i was lost in the forest, but you never heard. or didn't care. or i don't know. i wanted to give it to you once - many a time i would have, but you never came. never took it. never asked. so he ruined it. thanks.


If this silence is a reminder to me, I need not be reminded. If this pressure in my head is the absence of you, I need not be reminded. If the seasons that keep changing without you are a sign, don't wake me up tomorrow and maybe I'll be fine; there's never enough time to recuperate. The fallen house and broken doors, the empty hallways are no more, and if the sun will set upon this littered ground let it rise again somewhere else somehow. If you aren't turning back or coming home, or leaving me all alone, tell me now and I will know. But don't remind me it was so. I just wanted to be yours. And I wanted to recall those times we had so long ago. I wanted to watch the stars and wish on blue moons and count your battle scars. If letting this road be the last time I walk again is my folly, let me ere in my own way; it's my road, anyway. If by leaving behind this broken house with the doors that no longer open or close is my foolish choice in life, let me make it in the way I like. The sun is setting here. I am leaving out from here, and maybe God will let the sun rise somewhere else somehow. If you aren't coming home and holding me then leave me alone and I will be on my own. But don't you dare remind me that it's so. This silence is a pity, now I swear. I think that's something that you know, but I'm not so sure you care.


i was far too young and you were far too far away and we were all far along our way to see so far ahead we'd say that this is all the worst of ways to lead our lives in the worse ways to see the life we could have saved if lives we were able to save and maybe i will save the lives if i weren't too far away so far away to see ahead along this way i'm on that seems so wrong in this life i live.

Saturday, July 3, 2010

Sunny Boy Keep the Key From Him

"You, Him and Him"

it's late and i'm wide awake thinkin of you
and thinkin of him
and thinkin of him
and i don't know
what am i doin now i don't know
it's all a mess inside my head
crowded thoughts are sinkin in
who will say what is comin down?
i don't know this time around
i'm thinkin of you and thinkin of him
and yes, thinkin of him, too
he's a fool, so are you
but i know you will never know
never know
how close i came to goin back to you
it's late and im wide awake thinkin of nothin
and i'm gonna sleep well thinkin of him
not you, nor him, but him
and i am not turnin round
pushin those thoughts back down
i don't wanna go there again now



"Box Without a Key"

You took it all away in a box
wrapped in red ribbon and a black cord
and sealed with a silver lock
and a brand on the side in your blood
I had given it all to you after I
fought so hard to retrieve it from him
and delivered it in a envelope sealed
with my farewell kiss
But you never are going to keep that box
it'll stay sealed up tight, satin tied and lined
containing pieces of me
I had fought for in my own blood
I'd gotten it from him for you
Never mind now it's locked away
Luckily, you don't have the key



"My Sunny Boy"

My sunny boy you are the ray of light
this warm humid summertime
don't run away yet
The ones before were all metal armor shields
one was silver coated
and the other black
But you are like the summer sun with rays of light
and you are not a shield for me to try to get behind
No, you are all growth and warmth and feeling happy
and light
And they were metal, cold and steel, and waiting for
a fight
My sunny boy you are the setting sun for me
and the rising come each morning I awake to see
and I'm not sure where I'd be otherwise
The ones before were battle scarred and carrying their grief
hidden things behind their shields
But you are out here alive and free
You're just all growth and warmth and feeling happy
and light
And they're only metal, cold and steel, and waiting on
a fight
My sunny summer boy of joy
Don't you run away
And I'll stay a while beneath your light
and fear where I'd be otherwise


All by Elizabeth Azpurua

Friday, July 2, 2010

Summer Circus

Summer days in the
breeze, carted off in a
dream by fairies; the lightning bugs
like circus lights
and elephants thieves at the tent
take away your memories
come autumn time
and keep them like soldiers in
a fort
Lazy days of dreams gone by like
a mushroom hides from
the sky and you forget the warmth
and hide for a while;
a hidden thing in a costume;
I've fallen for the fake diamond
stolen by the elephants
caught in a dream by fairies which
battle lightning bugs in July,
and carry poems tucked inside
their fancy circus clothes
and steal away the
raspberries while the
stables close their doors
unable to pay rent
to the unicorn
My summer days spent in
the breeze wilst the flies
battle their memory thieves; the
elephants with their masks of
toucan feathers
And then come the stars and come the shine
like diamonds cut from the fake heart
sparkle forth above
and the lightning bugs seem benign
cart away my soul
to leave me here
and then the fairies ride unicorns
towards the circus tent

By Elizabeth Azpurua on 6/25/09