Monday, August 30, 2010

Leave Them Behind

heroes inside of the picture frames
they whisper while you walk by
and if you should ask them
why they all cry
they'll tell you you're leaving them behind
echoes follow down the staircase
and they call to you walking away
and if you should hear them
you'd hear them say
they had all the hopes stacked high for you
and somehow they all tumbled down
I was the decider and heard them too late
and the echoes all faded away
if I had stayed long enough to hear them
I would have heard what they'd say
They said don't, don't, don't
walk away
there are hopes to the sky and don't you dare wonder why
don't, don't don't
don't you forget to pray
there are millions of voices that will never voice thanks if you do
if you do
leave them behind
stupid, stupid, stupid
there were heroes in picture frames
whispering as you walked by
but you never asked them
no, never asked them why
they all cried
echoes followed you down the staircase
and they called to you walking away
but you never heard them
or heard what they said
there were hopes stacked high for you
and they tumbled down behind you
don't, don't, don't
walk away
don't, don't, don't
forget to pray
there are millions of voices that will never voice thanks if you ...
leave them behind
but I was the decider
and stupid, that choice was mine

By Elizabeth Azpurua on 8/29/10

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Say My Name

you said, Elizabeth
don't walk away
and I won't
told me you'd never leave, never ever, ever go
and I was an idiot
and thought you were true
and you chose another to love
something I would never do

They've called me baby, and darling, honey, and love
Lizzy, and Ellie, and Liz, and then hun
I've been sweetie and babe and sugar and doll
and lover and enchantress and once been called dove
But no one said it quite like you
and you never meant it, did you?

you said, Elizabeth
I'll be here within these five
and now look at you
told me you'd hold me, and save me, and be there
and here I assumed
thinking it could be true
but you've got another life
and I do not want you

So I can be baby, and darling, honey and love
Some call me Lizzy, and Ellie, Liz and hun
I will be sweetie, and babe, and sugar and doll
lover, enchantress, and maybe once again dove
And someone will say it better than you
and they will actually mean what is true

By Elizabeth Azpurua

We Became the Madness

bathing in milkweed
and ashes
taking time
and breaking time
sipping on toothpaste
and mangos
loosing your mind
as I've lost mine
and terrible like the magics
inside of this wilderness
I am cowering inside of a cornfield
and feeling helplessness
became the madness
making paper dolls
calling them my friends and asking them to call
became the madness
making newspaper shoes
walking over quicksand holding the images of you
you're bathing in milkweed
and I am the ashes
you lost your mind
as I've lost mine
we became the madness
and use plastic spoons as wings to fly
walking through a cornfield thinking we are living life

by elizabeth a.

Friday, August 27, 2010

Past Childhood Love

"Twilight Love"

Bright and yet unattainable
Chase the setting sun
and find the edge of day
Contrite and irreversible
Seek the rainbow's end
and find the edge of day
Fight this unexplainable
need for finding love
at the edge of day


"The Past"

Bear me away into the memories of
summer heat and cotton sheets
the imagery of youthful fun
and the feeling as we ran
Remind me of the happiness and
times we played together free
with the grass fresh cut and
happier were the days we
used to be apart of




Space, clouds, sailboats
and wings
Swords, tales, mirrors
and dreams
Roads, hikes, pillows
and swings
Love, lust, memories
and screams
Childhood changes

By Elizabeth Azpurua

Because I'm Addicted to You I'm Weak


i let you bring me down
to watch me drown
and let me down, down
i let you jerk me around
gagged and bound
you spun me around, around
i let you pull me away
from the only thing i ever needed
i let you push me off the edge
and shattered and broken
i pleaded
why did i let you bring me down?
you watched me drown
and let me down and down
why did i let you jerk me around?
i was gagged and bound
spinning around and around
i let you take me away
from the life i'd made myself
letting you tear me apart
and i know i was better than
my broken heart
and how this felt




your presence is clinging like cancer
addicted like you're a drug
i am like following a shadow
hallucinogen and
i am fading
your essence twirling like a dancer
across my eyes bewitching
like i'm mesmerized
hallucinogen and
i am overdosing
on you
seeing lies and lies of you


Both by me

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Wake Me tomorrow in Paradise

It's late and I'm awake, oh Mr. Dream-maker
Take the silt and sand from my eyes
And take me to your world of paradise

It's 2 a.m. and I can't sleep, my Dream-maker
Take the ash and soot from my bed
Take me wear you lay your head

I wanna sleep by you
Wanna wake in my dreams with you
Wanna spend the night beside you
and wake tomorrow there with you

Wake, wake, wake me when we leave
Take, take, take me when I sleep

It's passed 2 in the morning Dream-maker
Take the dust and cobwebs from the night
And wake me when the world is sunny bright

It's far too late and I'm here my Dream-maker
Take the air and scent it with happiness
I want to see your world and decompress

I wanna sleep by you
Wanna wake in my dreams with you
Wanna spend the night beside you
and wake tomorrow there with you

Won't you wake, wake, wake me when we leave?
Take me there, take me when we sleep
Let's just together close our eyes
Wake me tomorrow in paradise

Hello Mr. Dream-maker come lay beside me
Wake, wake, wake me when leave
Take, take, take me with you please

By Elizabeth Azpurua 8/25/10

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

I Can't Breathe

i'm sinking slowly
slowly down
try to keep my head high
try to keep my smile bright
i'm feeling everything collapsing now
stop me
i'm doomed
take me on a one way plane to somewhere else
take me for a day to escape as somebody else
take me far away from here and this changing rain
it's making all this pain, there's too much pain
and i...
...can't breathe
i'm sinking slowly dead
dying now
trying to keep myself intact
and not turn and look back
i'm feeling the walls crumble down
stop me please
i am doomed
take me on a one way plane somewhere else
take me for a day to escape as somebody else
take me far away from here, everything is changing
and the pain is overwhelming, so overwhelming
and i...
...can't breathe
i am dying
and no one knows
how i'm crying
no, no, no, no
i am sinking
sinking down into an abyss
somebody end this
take me for a day on a one way plane
let me escape all the pain
take me for a day to become somebody else
gotta get away from all the stress
save me from this changing rain
it washes all the hopes away
and drowns me in pain
i'm sinking slowly
slowly down
tried to keep my head high
and to keep my smile bright
but everything is collapsing now
and it's tearing me down
i'm doomed
take me on a one way plane to somewhere else
take me for a day to escape as somebody else
take me far away from here and this changing rain
i have to flee from all this pain, this overwhelming pain
because i...
...can't breathe

Goodbye Wayfarer


Wandering like a wayfarer
I seek you out,
I search about
Whimpering inside of me
Where are you?
Traveling, I'm the wayfarer
I need you now
so I search around
Whispering hopes in me
just to find you
I become the wayfarer
Seeking you out
Still looking now
Wishing here inside of me
now with you
now with you
I found you



"No Goodbye"

Hello, goodbye
nothing inbetween?
Where are the times
and what does this mean?
Why have you gone without
a goodbye?
Why am I left asking empty air why?
Hello, farewell
no more to say
What ever happend to us
and why did it happen this way?
What made you leave giving
no farewell?
Left with this empty air feeling like hell
I ask
hello? goodbye?
no farewells and no hi's
and where have you gone?
Where did we go wrong?
Hello, goodbye
no more to say
Whatever happened to us
and what made it all this way?
What made you leave
giving no farewell?
Come back to me so we can end this right a goodbye


By Elizabeth A

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Another Mad Poem

"Madness for the Peacemakers"

oh marvelor of infinity
the great madness
of the barrier reef
and solitude on the moon
of the charms we seal our
demise upon
and the silt in the bottom
of the endless pond
we shall drown the broken in
like the echoes in the senseless cave
dwelling of the imovable rage
like the wishers all gave pinecones
for their hearts
and bled out on the steps
of the cathederal walls


Saturday, August 21, 2010

Caviar and Winter Palaces

"Caviar and Winter"

you're like breast milk and honey
good for a time
but not enough to sustain
you're like springtime
beautiful, but lacking
the wisdom of age
I guess I'm caviar and winter
sharp, bitter, and strange
exquisite to someone
with impeccable tastes


"Traversed Palaces"

plucking from the music on my soul
and the tales I've not told
the essence of juniper
and moldings in gold
tile work and frescoes
and walls aged in stone
bring them and play me my rhymes
ask for the ladies who
danced in those times
and settle for nothing but tapestries
to see
the medieval workmanship of they
who knew how things could be
Amber and scarlet
and brocades in deep folds
and sheerest, of dearest, upon me they hold
the audience magnified by the mirrors in gilt
for I traversed palaces
and forgot all of it

all by me

Friday, August 20, 2010

...ignore the rambling of a breaking heart that doesn't know why it even bothers to break anymore...

I guess it's not a big deal to pull
on my heart strings
leave me kneeling
and walk on by
the nights spent arousing and
dark are nothing
but ways to pass
the time on by
Your promises now are dust in
the silence you've left
where I'm bleeding
and fighting to cry
and the echoes of past times we
talked of the world we
would travel together
have now said goodbye

And suddenly I mean nothing...
..because I asked you for something
that seems really awful of you deliberately ignore me now
how could you?

...I am bothered.

Questioning and perplexed.
It's fine I guess I was wrong
...I'm good at that.

Angry and Sick the Caster Casts a Net My Way

"Sick Minded"

i am sick with anger
like vomit
like bile
this taste upon my tongue becomes
my poison
i have dealt you pain here
to cease your voice
and while
you shrivel inward; the sight becomes
my absolution


I get so tired of the lack of care, as if I don't exist, don't matter, I am unimportant, useless, forgotten...
Am I a reason to walk on by?
I'm trying to put lanterns up to light your way and you shred them angry, and raged, and I wonder why, oh why in the world do I put myself through this?
Is it ok to simply walk by me and pretend I am nothing more than the wall of this building? Is it ok to look right through me as if I am a specter, a figment of your imagination, an illusion of someone you don't give a damn about?
Am I really so unimportant?
Is my voice like a nail piercing your ears? Are my hands like knives seeking your skin? Are my eyes like caverns leading you down?
Do you envision me captive inside of my shell or out on the mountains speaking out nonsense? For surely my existence means nothing to you and you'd rather believe no importance.
I cannot stand sitting here knowing that you never cared and that I've been the fool all along.
I cannot sit smiling pretty and pretending I'm happy when I'm angry because I'm not only wrong, but I have been a fool all this time presuming I meant more to you then a speck lost in the carpet of your floor.
I have smiled my last smile for you, laughed my last laugh with you, and given my last damn for you.
When you wonder, if you ever wonder where I'm at, I hope you get lost seeking me out.
I was never good enough for your company.
Nor do I now wish to be.



Oh, caster cast your last net my way
Reel me in like I am lost at sea
and steal a kiss from my lips
breathe the breath of life in me
Caster in your boat made of hope
carry me through this pain I bear
and rescue me from the troublesome
wrap me in love like a coat I'll wear
Oh, caster cast your last net my way
I might be all you wished to capture
And as the sun sets upon these waves
Steal a kiss from my lips to enrapture
Caster in your boat made of hope
My savior sailing these seas
Give me life back and take me ashore
Answerer of my pleas

All by elizabeth azpurua

Thursday, August 19, 2010

I Said Break Another Day

"I Said Break"

it's the time you spend in the shadows
watching shadows
making shadows
it's the light from those windows
broken windows
no more windows
i said break them
and make them
make shadows for company
i said break them
to erase them
bring shadows to comfort me
i said break them
to break them
was to erase parts of me
play with shadows
all my shadows
glass edged shadows
to break in me



"Another Day"

it's like trying to walk through quicksand
and eating acrid tree roots by the cliff side
like throwing yourself over the edge
or walled away alone, shut off and tied
it's like yanking your hair out
and screaming with no voice
sometimes living life is a nightmare
and you wonder at your choice
it's the swallowing in darkness
your soul frightened with no lights
it's the sweltering feeling of oppression
clutching your chest, your fist clenched tight
so you kick, and you fight, and you falter
and you stand up and turn around and go
and on and on is your process don't pause or
you'll fall down and you'll never know
morning will come when you wake up
God grant you another day
and the nightmares that plagued you seemed endless
but you'll feel alive your first breath once you wake
the world turns once more to bring us out of the night
and into the light
and you'll know then you're fine
we're all going to be fine...
so battle the mountains that rise up in your way
and forget the silence that is cheering you on
you will master the ability to bring out your strength
and once you know that you know you're strong
remember the night does not go on and go on
when you feel you're living a nightmare
there are more doors that you'll open just waiting on you
and no matter the hardships you bear
just know...
you're one more day away
turn the page
God grants you another day

8/19/10 By Elizabeth Azpurua
credit for "the world turns once more to bring us out of the night and into the light" to Drew Bach

Monday, August 16, 2010

Mr. Blue Eyes in Burgundy

erase the static and the sound of my heart
is it love that makes it feel so loud?
erase the pain and the forgetfulness
is it love keeping me bound?
take back the promises I am holding to
is it love keeping me within reach?
pluck out your eyes that have been haunting me
is it love that makes me so weak?
I cannot quit you nor can I erase your voice
cannot outrun you nor make another choice
you are in every fleeting thoughtless dance
I am left here without a chance
to be free
Mr. Blue Eyes in your burgundy
is it love holding you to me?

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Pandora's Box is in Your Mouth

"I Lust After Your Mouth"

You're a genius with words I can hardly
begin to fathom
A mastermind at making me gasp
Such purety from your mouth
I'm left wanting and needing and
never wanting you to stop
The ebb and flow, build and descend
and the moment I'm left on the edge
I feel innocent and wanton
Wise and then I play the fool
I'm watching the worlds you create in words
paint pictures over my eyes
And I can only beg you for more when I ask
for you to tell me of the world
I lust after your mouth
and every phrase on the edge of your tongue
the way the images come to life
and in your mastery I learn what I truly need
it's the way life is created in my imagination
and the spaces inbetween
your words



"Pandora's Box"

was what we opened
we thought we knew
how to cope
but we don't
we felt the sickness
spread through us then
and knew we had erred
and knew we can't win
so shut the lid
but the wrong escaped already
and i can't make it better
i will never heal the scars
no, no
so shut the lid and hope to god
we can end the problems caused
but hun you'll never heal the marks
made by them
now when they tell you
just to listen
don't assume you know
you never know


Elizabeth Azpurua

Saturday, August 14, 2010

Remember to Live Waiting on a Crown From Your Hands

"Seeing You Makes Me Remember To Live"

Your eyes are the color of the summer sky
painted flowers by
and by
Your eyes are the beauty of the blue sea
waves are rolling
Your eyes are a marvel made by God's grace
completing your face
your face
Your eyes are the reason I wake each morning
reminding me
of living


"Without a Crown"

Bought the flowers bought the dress
placed the ringlets in my hair
and I'm waiting on the crown you
had promised would be here
caught the butterflies inside of me
and I'm fighting not to care
you had said you would be waiting
but you're not here
I am holding hopes and dreams for you
wearing a dress of silk for you
and waiting on the promise you had made
I am waiting on your mouth to move
tell me that you wanted to
bought the flowers and the dress
wearing lapis blue for you like your eyes
I am waiting on the crown from you
you promised would be mine here
with the hope that's fading inside of me
I am trying not to cry
You said you would be ready
but you're not here
I am letting hopes and dreams fall for you
staining in tears this silk dress for you
discarding the promise you had made
I will never see your mouth move
because I know you never wanted to
I waited until the sun went down
Blurry eyed and without a crown



"Your Hands Are Waiting"

I fight off demons
fight off doom
and fight off pain
and wait on you
I fight off endings
fight off gloom
and fight the rain
and wait for you
And now I know why I am here
And why you catch me inside fear
I know your hands are waiting strong
Carry me on carry me on
You have a power in your arms
To lift my high and safe from harm
Each time I falter and fall down
You lift me up and kiss my frown
I fight off demons
Fight off doom
I fight off pain
And wait on you
I fight the endings
fight this room
so full of pain
but stand by you
You lift me up and lift me out
and you show me what life's about
You are the happy that brings the light
Always there to help me in this fight
And now I know why I am here
With you the meaning becomes clear


By Elizabeth Azpurua

Thursday, August 12, 2010

If Venus Hated the Sun

It's like I'm your satalight and I
rotate around you like I can't be without you now
it's all a blur without you now
I'm collecting thoughts in my pocketbook
saving rocks that were the ones we took
when we played before
you've got me like a fool
trading roses for caricatures
and making murals out of my tears
and painting them in glitter and gold
and it was all sunshine before
but the light is getting old
So I chaffe and I pull
stuck on an axis I can't leave
It's between your gravity and your beauty
and I'm mesmerized to remain
You've got me leading lines into songs for you
and proclaiming the love that is never true
and it's all a blur here in this empty space
I begin to kick and fight at you
make you hurt the way I wanted to
and still the night with your screams
for me to shut up
you're pincushions for me to poke
the needles were the words I spoke
but I don't know what I'd do without you
I'm all around you
I am itching at my bindings and trading insults
and laughing at the way I load these catapolts
just to throw the stones at you
and watch the way my words hurt you
You've got me naming my scars in Greek
and singing the hymns of funeral rights
I am leaving the messes in a collage on the floor
and taking hammers to the tiles
breaking the sight
Until I want to see again your light
It's like I'm your satalight and I
rotate around you like I can't be without you now
and I want away from you now
So I fling the hurt at you
and hope the weight of guilt kills you
and I fight and pull and tug and break and bend
you became pincushions that I always poke
bleeding from the cruelties I spoke
loaded catapolts to tear down your walls
making the insults rip from you pleading calls
and hammer the surface of tile work depicting our life
your roses are dead, dear
and the rocks are in the ground
but I still can't break away
held bound
rotating around you like I cannot
if venus hated the sun, it would feel this way
Mesmerized by you I have to stay
making murals out of tears in glitters and gold
it's the mockery of a metaphor of your worth

By Elizabeth Azpurua

Sunday, August 8, 2010


We all build paper mansions
We all store our hopes in the seas
We carry our burdens like our new clothes
and we think to ourselves we are free
We are dying for nothing
and living for loss
We are trying for failing
and fall for a cost
We are eating our hands off
and feeding the dust
Who is the mastermind here?
Someone open your eyes and see this clear
Clearly, we are destroying ourselves
We all build up paper lifestyles
Storing dreams below the seas
We hold our burdens above our heads
like a flag to say we're free
We are dying for nothing
and living for loss
We are trying for failing
and fall for the cost
We are tearing our hearts out
and feeding the dust
Who made this our everyday?
Someone better realize there's a better way
why destroy ourselves?
Why do we want to end us?
We die for nothing
and live with the loss


Elizabeth Azpurua