Singing The Wrong Moon Song

Sitting here alone on the floor beside my bed

My thoughts are claiming victims in my head

All about the stillness inside this room

Is illuminated by the moon

I said to my lover I will be returning soon

I lied again beneath the winter moon

I said to my lover I will be singing our tune

But I sang a different song under the moon

It goes like: “I’m a sightless sorter

With a profound disorder

Everything without order

I am holding at the border

All the things like a hoarder

Buried deep in the mortar”

Sitting here by my bedside table on the floor

I have oft been called words that rhyme with door

All about the stillness inside of this little room

Is illuminating all the lies under my moon

I promised my lover I would be returning soon

I deceived again underneath the winter moon

I said to my lover I will always sing our tune

But I sang a different song under the moon

It sounds like: “I’m a sightless sorter

With a profound disorder

Everything without order

I am holding at the border

All the things like a hoarder

Buried deep in the mortar

All my victims piled up high

Like a macabre wall to the sky

I just like leaving them to die

Let ‘em all hang out to dry

They ask why; I don’t know why

I just like to hear them cry”

My room is lonely and it’s silent

Some say I should just repent

If I did I’d feel I’m sorry

But, I know that I’m not sorry

I promised my lover I would be returning soon

I deceived again underneath the winter moon

I said to my lover I will always sing our tune

But I sang a different song under the moon

It sounds like: “I’m a sightless sorter

With a profound disorder

Everything without order

I am holding at the border

All the things like a hoarder

Buried deep in the mortar

All my victims piled up high

Like a macabre wall to the sky

I just like leaving them to die

Let ‘em all hang out to dry

They ask why; I don’t know why

I just like to hear them cry”

Sitting by the window on this floor

The moon is calling me a whore

I may not know what I did it for

I just know I’ve done this before

Promising lovers I’d come home soon

Leave them alone beneath their moon

I promise them I’ll sing their tune

Just so I can sing beneath another moon

Singing songs like “I’m a sightless sorter

With a profound disorder

Everything without order

I am holding at the border

All the things like a hoarder

Buried deep in the mortar

All my victims piled up high

Like a macabre wall to the sky

I just like leaving them to die

Let ‘em all hang out to dry

They ask why; I don’t know why

I just like to hear them cry

I’m a sightless sorter

With a profound disorder

I like walls made of torture

I hold them at the border

Pile them high like a hoarder

Buried deep in the mortar

All my victims way up high

Like a macabre wall to the sky

I sit to watch them die

Beneath a moonlit sky

I can’t tell you why

I just like to hear them cry”

by: Elizabeth Azpurua

Silenced Deep Down

"Deep Down"

One of these days

I’m going to explode

I don’t want to be here

When I battle against them

All of their chains upon me

All of their walls around me

They want to shun me now

Stuff me into a hole deep down

All of the illusionists there

They don’t happen to care

Where they spin their tales

Pervasive; hearts have failed

One of these days

I’m going to erupt

I don’t want to be here

When I wage war against them

All of their ropes upon me

And their fortress around me

They want to shut me out

Stuff me into a hole deep down

Saying I am an ailment in their side

Like a poison dart I’m opening wide

All of their false and wrong insides

Tell me why must we all hide?

Let it all out – I’m erupting

Time to call out this farce

Here I go now – exploding

Level them out; it’s sparse

Nothing left now that’s false

Bury ‘em down…

Or they will stuff me in hole deep down

1/9/15 

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

“Silenced Songbird”

Am I diseased or crazy?

Perhaps I’m mad and touched

They never want to hear me

Tell me stand there and hush

They want to marvel at my beauty

But I mustn’t make a sound

When did it happen that the songbird

Cannot sing aloud?

Struck with envy

Struck with greed

They are yanking feathers off of me

And they want me – never freed

To be silent

Am I diseased or crazy?

Perhaps I’m a fool for all of them

They never want to hear me

They want me beautifully broken

I should like to sing so loud their ears bleed

They are sick with envy corrupted by greed

Plucking my feathers one by one

I am through with silence

I am done

1/14/15

By: Elizabeth Azpurua

My Own Song

Maybe I’m an error

a polluted sea

A broken mirror

or an arbitrary thing

Am I your reflection?

You see contempt in me

Something that you’ll question

just to prove to me

That I’m one foot out the door into the wrong

That I’m down a road toward Old Babylon

Saying I’m still singing Satan’s song

I’ll play along, I’ll play along

Maybe I’m off center

I can’t stand up straight

Wouldn’t life be fairer

if I remained in a pure state?

Am I your reflection?

You don’t like seeing me

You hold an accusation

just to prove to me

That I’m one foot out the door into the wrong

That I’m down a road toward Old Babylon

Saying I’m still singing Satan’s song

I’ll play along, I’ll play along

I’m a mismatch puzzle

or a broken door

A crooked picture

and a metaphor

I’m off kilter and silently bewitched

Unraveling from everything you stitched

Like a tapestry refusing to remain

What you made it

You can’t hang it

Maybe I have errors

My threads are colorful

All of my accusers

Aren’t very thoughtful

Am I your reflection?

No? Yet you won’t see

Beyond your accusation

Of what I’m still to be

I am not one foot out a door leading to wrong

Nor on any road named “Old Babylon”

The only song I sing is my own song

All I’ve wanted is to be me all along

By: Elizabeth Azpurua

1/4/15

Stitched Up With Wrongs

My feet cannot move to their music
For there's barely any melody
It sounds mostly like repetitive
Tap, tap, tapping
My body is not rigid, but fluid
It dips melodically
Incapable of robotic
One, two, three-ing
My voice cracks and whispers
My lips speak of lust
Their's automatically responds
With what is just
My arms can't act out their charades
My logic can't perform their parody
It's mostly too rehearsed
One, two , three-acting
I cannot dance to their rhythm
Nor sing their worship songs
I was never made for this
I'm all stitched up with wrongs

By: Elizabeth Azpurua

Awed by the Sea

"Claimed by the Sea"

Perhaps if I grow fins and scales
And learn to sing songs of whales
I'd find below your shipwrecked soul
Saving you would be my greatest role
But without feet I'd be chained to the sea
Saving you would mean I'd not be free
To walk above with you on land
Or bask in the sun-drenched sand
Such a fate that would prove to be
No matter what claimed by the sea

By: Elizabeth Azpurua

4/6/14


:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

"Awed By You"

Lately I don't know what else to think
Just on the edge of reason, on the brink
Would that I could settle us down
Build us a place I may have found
I'd do anything to keep that smile upon your face
Your olive skin, your sable hair and unkempt grace
I feel I am awed by all that you seem
May I applaud all that you dream?
Perhaps we can be just what I need?
Lately I don't know why my thoughts are far reached
Looking for moments, my heart's been breached
You've opened the doors to feeling
Leaving me breathless and reeling
I'd do anything to keep that look upon your face
Your blue eyes, your sable hair and unkempt grace
I feel I am awed by all the you can mean
May I applaud all that I have seen?
Please agree to be just what I need

By: Elizabeth Azpurua

4/9/14

No More Anymore

     my love was - sought for
       like a lover but done for
     I am unwitting and I am sore
but who says, oh who says more?

 should she linger?, no - she shan't now
       does his finger hold the power now?
       did the dam break the new day?
oh, come again, oh come what may

E'r the dawning comes like cold rain
      awash our souls in the bitter pain
  does it hurt now? something says yes
and burns the soul as it aches the chest

           my love was - just a wish
like I spent time awaiting a wish
  to be born from the edge of this
        in an escaping sigh or a kiss

    shall they linger?, no - they should not
let them wander or lost or become forgot
like a day, or dawn, or a ray, or gone -
 said the silence, said the silent dawn
    in a whimper, or a whisper, or a song
    she said come what may, come along
Oh, be still, oh unsure, but tarry on
      and wait for the rain to be gone
      linger just enough 'til the dawn

      my love was - silence now
    to be burnt in my flesh how?
Like a live wire, a lightning bolt of pain
should I let it mark and scar and remain?
     I am unwitting and I am sore
  and I do not want this anymore

           no,
I cannot want it at all  - no, no more
           no, I cannot want it anymore

9/7/13

Purple Painted

she's a silent twister
in a realm of wrongs
she's claiming sister
like we shared our songs
but my mouth can't match her lies
and my tongue can't perform disguise
she's a roller coaster
down a one way track
heavy lidded poster
with a branded back
my hands can't make those costumes
nor find my way out of her lost rooms
purple painted wasted
dip down and let go
purple painted wasted
i am drowning i know
and in the elevated moment
i am bound inside such torment
she's a silent twister
spinning a world of wrongs
she called me sister
like we shared our songs
but my mouth can't match her lies
and my tongue can't perform disguise
she's a roller coaster
with a pinwheel track
a heavy lidded poster
with a branded back
my hands can't make her costumes
nor find my way out of those lost rooms
purple painted wasted
i am drowning i know
purple painted wasted
can i run and let go?
and in the elevated moment
i am bound inside such torment
what for, i wonder
what for, i ask
wasting painting purple
on another mask

Vividly

I have been running and fighting the dawn
needing the darkness to help me along
but all this erring and I've done wrong
and the day breaks vividly

I have been hiding and evading the dawn
needing the moonlight to shine on strong
but all my erring knowing I'm wrong
the day still breaks vividly

I have been seeking and searching on
fleeing the dawn with its sunny song
but all my erring and all of my wrong
wilts in the day breaking vividly

Sunlight is shedding the light on the lawn
I laying out in the grass, see the wrong
like a macabre sinister whispered song
while the day breaks vividly

There is the truth, I lost to the dawn
caught in the sunlight glaringly strong
while all are knowing that I was wrong
for you in the day breaking vividly

You slayed me there, death going on
remnants of nothing to utter a song
just the reminder the night was wrong
I was wrong, aching vividly

I have been running and fighting the dawn
needing the darkness to help me along
but all this erring and I still did wrong
caught dying as the day breaks vividly

Sleeping Thoughts of Babylon

"Road to Babylon"

 

I sing the wayward song of a temptress done wrong

My movements beguile and bewilder

As I walked the road to Babylon

I found those who did surrender

They sang of long sultry nights of wrong

With bodies they don’t remember 

So I sang to them of Maryanne

I said she sounds like her tongue would taste like Lucifer’s

With sunset hair and vixen ways to cast her curse

And I was smitten by that vixen on a cloudy day of summertime sin 

I sang my telltale signs of wicked wrong

With my body moving as I did deliver

A song to fill the air headed to Babylon

I tell them of how in lust I did surrender

With the words of my ever sinful song

I became Babylon’s number one contender 

I sang to them of Maryanne

With lips and a tongue tasting just like Lucifer’s

Sunset hair, this vixen cast her curse

And I was utterly doomed and smitten on a cloudy day of summertime sin 

I tasted rain, she tasted pain

We tumbled in the fields of grain

She marked me thrice while I learned to pay the price

Of letting go with a vixen 

They all did cheer me on as I sang my song

On the way down the road to Babylon 

6/25/13 

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"Sleeping Beast"

 

Inside you lies a sleeping beast awaiting its welcomed release

The flavor like a feline rare inside to come apart to tear

These visions in my eyes do come like rivers about to overrun

Feed it the darkness; feed it with death, with carrion what it likes best

The temperament like a raging storm and it feels so, so warm

Give it a playtime; let it go, ‘til it settles inside to show

You hold the reigns and still the beast, though it pains ‘til its release 

6/6/13

 

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"Words, Thoughts and my Soul"

 

Sometimes there are words which emotions know not

and emotions which know no words

Sometimes my thoughts do not make into words

and my words don't match my thoughts

The truth of my words knows neither my heart nor my head

when my heart won't listen to my thoughts

So my thoughts scatter down and my soul wears a frown

without words to make sense of these things

 

6/28/13

Time Burdens

"Burdens"

Your burdens on your back are glue to you
like tar but drenched in a hue
that resembles a berry wine
They weigh you down and hold you back
to convey now what you lack
with the ability to say you're fine
They feel so heavy, feel like stones
sing a song that sounds like moans
with your burdens burying you
They weigh you down to sink you dead
beneath the ground above your head
those burdens know what to do
they weigh on you
they weigh on you
So peel them off and throw them down
and trample them, do not frown
but step away and raise your arms
With lighter thoughts and freedom songs
you'll walk away from all those wrongs
no need to hear their loud alarms
just walk away
just walk away
they weighed on you too long, I'd say
just walk away

6/10/13



::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

"Take Your Time"

 

Graze my shoulder, trace my spine

Lay your head against mine

Take me slow, take your time

Darling, you’re in your prime

Like a dance, like we dine

Let our movements intertwine

If we rush it would be a crime

So take me slow, take your time

Mold your mouth against mine

I will hold no caution sign

Take me slow, take your time

Play my body until I chime

There will be no final finish line

Until we count to sixty-nine

Oh, take me slow, oh take your time

Do not rush this upward climb

Like a smooth, rich, perfect wine

Savor every moment we combine

 

6/6/13

Stutter, Sing and Grow

"Singing Night"

but what of angels' wings
and forlorn songs
where whisperings
float through the night
to caress the trees
and open you
to insightful things?
the inspiration I was seeking
came about within my needing
sitting in the woods and dreaming
might the night upon me singing
wake my soul into it's breathing
and carry me back to me?

5/21/13



::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

"Sputtering and Stuttering"

what a jumbled mess i am
in streams of thoughts
and paper pans
and holding signs that read no words
but gestures of what
cannot be heard
i am stuttering mentally
sputtering internally
on all this mess
these weary days i am unraveling
but who can say what shall come next?
what a jumbled mess i am
in screams of silence
with thrown up hands
and holding signs that stare back in white
with no words of what
shall ever be heard
i am stuttering mentally
sputtering internally
on all this forsaken mess
these lonely days i've been traveling
but who can say where i will end up next?

5/1/13

::::::::::::::::::::::::::

"Grow"

Ashen carpet, darkened days
in rivulets left in the haze
those mournful times now let it be
just a portion of this history
for though the signs be startling
and changed upon and beneath
letting it be and letting it go
just wait for life again to grow

5/23/13

Winter is Coming

"Winter"

Candles and lights and trees abound
and red ribbons tied 'round the street
with each little flake I am feeling
angels are falling on me
and they're whispering songs
as the greet me from heaven
and wrap me in arms of ice
Mistletoe clinging to branches up high
leaves me trying to reach toward the sky
I have faltered on ice and snow in the woods
while on the way to you
but Winter can't stop the warmth in my heart
whenever I think about you 

::::::::::::::::::::::::

"Coming"

It's coming.....20 days left they say
It's coming.....and the world will be done that day
So they say
So they say
But I am dreaming of touching your face
and hearing your laugh
and sharing your space
I am dreaming of being held by you
so the world is not ending, no, this isn't true
It's coming.....20 days left they say
It's coming.....and the world ends on that day
But they say
and they say
the craziest things
For nothing will stop all my dreams
I am dreaming of touching your face
and hearing your laugh
and sharing your space
I am dreaming of being held by you
The world will not end until this is true

12/1/12

Redefined

Settled into town you did I see with my eyes

Squared with a peg and bricks built of lies

Not a lot of sense near the waking time

You're hiding

Confiding

Built a little cave you did I have realized

Fermented skin and brass not paralyzed

Broke out of fear in liquor and lime

You're hiding

Deciding

 

Sip brandy, chug wine

Walk the level on the line

Break the balance entwined

with a lady confined

Sip whiskey, chug wine

Waking up with no sign

of yourself now redefined

after letting go of your mind

That's fine

 

Made a space for you with lust on the rise

Spurred on by a thong and shapely thighs

Not a lot of sense near the waking time

You're hiding

Finding

Got a mystery under lock and key immortalized

Temples bursting into whispering centralized

Near your fears in your mind this time

You're hiding

Blinding

 

Sip brandy, chug wine

Walk the level on the line

Break the balance entwined

with a lady confined

Sip whiskey, chug wine

Waking up with no sign

of yourself now redefined

after letting go of your mind

That's fine

 

Squared with a peg and bricks building your lies

Make a tomb of mortar and wait while it dries

Won't make a cozy bed at the waking time

Keep hiding

Biding

Your time 'til it all makes sense and the lights turn on

Your time 'til you recompense what you have done wrong

Your time 'til the lies break down with an empty song

Your time 'til you realize this never made you strong

 

Sip poison, chug wine

There's never a level on the line

No more balance when entwined

with the devil inside

Your whiskey and wine

Won't feel so divine

when you wake up redefined

by the monsters in your mind

Was it fine?

Was it fine?

Was it fine, now, tell me so?

What is right in this light, do you even know?

 

Built a little cave you did I have realized

Fermented skin and brass not paralyzed

Broke out of fear in liquor and lime

You're hiding

Deciding

Finding

You're blinding

Yourself with your lies

 

Sip brandy, chug wine

Here's your devil on a line

He's laughing now entwined

with your lady confined

and you're waking with no sign

of yourself now redefined

with no traces of the mind

you would find

if you'd tried

if you'd tried

 

by: Elizabeth Azpurua