Tu Me Manques

Upon a hill and beneath a tree
Your sword in hand and hair blown free
You're smiling face and sea blue eyes
Are a waiting home but I'm paralyzed
The hill is too far; the tree is gone
The place beneath the sky there is wrong
I am trapped in memories dressed as dreams
Why do nightmares dress in yesterday's seams?
Where is the hill and the old oak tree?
Where does your sword rest alone waiting?
You're smiling face and sea blue eyes
Are nowhere near and I'm paralyzed
The hill is lost and the tree is gone
You're missing from me and I'm alone
Tu me manques but still appear in dreams
Why do nightmares dress in yesterday's seams?
You're missing from me with your eyes like sea
Tu me manques mon amour, do you miss me?
I'm paralyzed and waiting...
...but this is all a dream

Elizabeth Azpurua

Roses Red

anger is a fist
anger is a scream
anger is a yell
a nightmare not a dream
don't ever ask them why
the angry often cry
anger hurts them both
anger doesn't lie

shatter all the moments
in record breaking time
angry at the loss
angry at the crime

let it out...
...shout

she said paint her roses red
she wanted them painted red
nothing mattered then
but that
'why aren't my roses red
did you hear what I had said?'
the moment came and went
at that

anger is a fist
anger is a scream
roses torn a part
by Alice in a dream
she doesn't know why
she began to cry
angry at the Queen
anger doesn't lie

the looking glass is shattered
in record breaking time
angry now and cross
angry at the crime

let it all out now
shout it all out now

roses remained white
such a bright sight
Alice left that night
she didn't want to fight

9/28/14

by: Elizabeth Azpurua

Liquid Silence

"Liquid Fire"

Pin me down
and set fire to these bones
let it rage on
til I'm unknown
settle into me
and stifle all my moans
let it all go on
until I have shown
ecstasy
like liquid fire through my veins
purity
in form, no lies, no constrains
eruption in flames

by: Elizabeth Azpurua

5/16/14

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"Leave Me Be in Silence"

no such thing that i have known since then
shall tell me of what a man knows not
and when
when i know i'll tell you so
if every incantation formed by these lips
should stutter out the weight of all, of
all of this
i know not to make it so
my memories in my dreams are overun
and time tells nothing in my solitude
that i've begun
erasing what i knew
no such thing that i had known since then
or will or what i might have shown to
any men
i cannot make it so
leave me be
silence............silence is all i ask and no questions
he was there like a ghost; no illusions
no such thing that i have known since then
shall tell me of what they know not
and if
if i could tell it so
if every wish from my wishing lips
should have fallen with the weight of all,
of all of this
i may never make it, oh
my memories of him in dreams are overun
and time tells nothing in my solitude
that i've begun
erasing what i knew
in a bottle; no such thing i'll ever know again
or will or what i might know from any
other men
i cannot make it so
leave me be
in silence........silence

by: Elizabeth Azpurua
5/16/14

Rhododendron Labyrinth

what is the meaning
of all these dreams?
whilst I was walking
in shallow streams
I learned the error
of my wayward ways
inside my terror
inside this haze
I cannot see the purpose
for all my troubling days

oh, rhododendron labyrinth
what shall be the marker?
what shall be the tenth?
I offer offerings for my future life
shall I take or shall I be a wife?

inward resolution
cycle circling
tell me my confusion
now rendering
my echoing

what is the meaning
of my nightmarish dreams?
whilst I was walking
in the shadowed streams
I know my errors
of my wayward days
inside my terrors
leave me in a daze
I cannot see my future
all these leading ways

oh, rhododendron labyrinth
shall I sleep below you?
what shall be my tenth
that I shall owe you?
I offer offerings for my future life
perhaps to end these days of strife

needless confusion
cycle circling
now rendering
my echoing
of wondering

By: Elizabeth Azpurua

5/9/14

Awed by the Sea

"Claimed by the Sea"

Perhaps if I grow fins and scales
And learn to sing songs of whales
I'd find below your shipwrecked soul
Saving you would be my greatest role
But without feet I'd be chained to the sea
Saving you would mean I'd not be free
To walk above with you on land
Or bask in the sun-drenched sand
Such a fate that would prove to be
No matter what claimed by the sea

By: Elizabeth Azpurua

4/6/14


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"Awed By You"

Lately I don't know what else to think
Just on the edge of reason, on the brink
Would that I could settle us down
Build us a place I may have found
I'd do anything to keep that smile upon your face
Your olive skin, your sable hair and unkempt grace
I feel I am awed by all that you seem
May I applaud all that you dream?
Perhaps we can be just what I need?
Lately I don't know why my thoughts are far reached
Looking for moments, my heart's been breached
You've opened the doors to feeling
Leaving me breathless and reeling
I'd do anything to keep that look upon your face
Your blue eyes, your sable hair and unkempt grace
I feel I am awed by all the you can mean
May I applaud all that I have seen?
Please agree to be just what I need

By: Elizabeth Azpurua

4/9/14

Won't See Me Dead

sit blowing smoke
cough, and choke
I see you wasting away
my iron fist inside this glove
wishes to push and shove
you right off your sofa

I saw the future once
Call me a freak with a psychic touch
I don't give a damn much
but this -
this was different, I know
his blue eyes told me so
but you don't care, I know, I know

so wrap yourself in a coma
high in a world of your mind
I will battle while you on the sofa
sit wrapped in smoke half blind
I will put on my armor
to fight for my future
what I saw I believe
even if you can't conceive
of such things

sit blowing smoke,
sitting there broke
wasting your days
but my inner resolution
is seeking a solution
to let all this go

But my anger is kindled
while your time you have swindled

Call me a freak with a psychic touch
I don't give a damn much
but this -
this was different, I know
his blue eyes told me so
but you don't care, I know, I know

so wrap yourself in a coma
high in a world of your mind
I will battle while you on the sofa
sit wrapped in smoke half blind
I will put on my armor
to fight for my future
what I saw I believe
even if you can't conceive
of such things
in my dreams

I can't deny
nor try
so I'll cry
yet one day, perhaps I'll see
sense made to me
I will not waste my determination
he was not a figment of my imagination
the future is a destination

so stay in a coma
high in your mind
sprawled on your sofa
because you're blind
I in my armor
eyes set ahead
know that my future
won't see me dead
won't see me dead
won't see me dead

by: Elizabeth Azpurua

Come What May I Said

Deserts are trouble when you crave the sea
and I am trouble if you're craving me
I am spending my pennies on stones I won't keep
to offer as gifts to the ones in the trees
and I say
"Come what may"
and come it will
over and under until
I shall face
a new day
where my life has gone still
reaching the top of my hill

Forests are trouble if you need a stream
and I am trouble if you don't want a dream
I am sewing my seeds for a garden of sheep
to count until I find sleep and relief
and I say
"Come what may"
and come it will
over and under until
I shall face
a new day
where my life has gone still
reaching the top of my hill

By: Elizabeth Azpurua

10/23/13

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"I Said"

I know I said that this would last
that nothing would ever make this pass
but now I see I cannot keep
promises when I am weak
I know I said that this would be real
and never falter from what I feel
but I just learned I cannot keep
a promise when you make me weak
Sorry won't fix it; no bandaid to heal
I said what I said and I thought it was real
but what I said I had said I didn't understand
my promises would not turn out as planned

10/16/13

Love? Or Just another lonely night?

I bet you've tried a time or two

put yourself out there

let go of being scared

Thought you'd seen the light

found the one you need

now you could succeed

and then it all went wrong

 

I bet you cried a time or two

wishing for the way

that people keep promising

Thought it'd turn out right

that you found what you need

and you wouldn't beg and plead

but, damn it turns out wrong

 

Will it always rain when you're wanting sunshine?

Does it hurt to say you're tired of saying "I'm fine"

Tell me do you know the way to love that feels right

or is it always going to be just another lonely night?

 

I've tried a time or two

and then tried not to care

see how well I've fared?

Thought I'd find the light

and learn what I do need

like I could succeed

when I'm always wrong

 

I have cried a time or two

wishing for the day

tired of promising

that I'll be alright

when all I need

was hope to intercede

but I was so wrong

 

Will it always rain when you're wanting sunshine?

Does it hurt to say you're tired of saying "I'm fine"

Tell me do you know the way to love that feels right

or is it always going to be just another lonely night?

I've learned to love the rain without the sunshine

Learned to perfect the art of saying "I'm fine"

Maybe I'll never learn a love that feels right

Just writing songs on another lonely night

 

Damn it, and tell me why it seems

that all of our dreams

come after sleepless nights

where we don't know?

Damn it, tell me why love seems

to combat all our dreams

unraveling out nights

in all that we don't know?

 

Will it always rain when you need sunshine?

Will it always hurt to tell them you're fine

Is there a way to find love that feels right

or just a way to another lonely night?

Oh, I don't know

I don't know

 

By: Elizabeth Azpurua



It's All About Blue Eyes Here

"Twinkling Blue"

You give that wicked grin
and eyes a twinkling blue
I know you're thinking things
involving me and you
I want to stay and listen
to your laughter here
Capturing your happiness
caught inside your cheer

10/8/13

By: Elizabeth Azpurua



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"Eyes of Blue"

sometimes I reach out to shadows when reaching in dreams
to catch you while lucid; moments unraveling their seams
they're fleeting and dodge me until I awake
to torments of daylight and moments of fake
I just want to see you
and your eyes of blue

9/30/13

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"Your Blue Eyes Meet My Brown"

I'm trying to think of a poem
to explain the way sometimes
I feel you're apart of me
but there aren't words fluid enough
to express the notion that
you and I are of the same cloth
your blue eyes meet my brown
the way the mountains reach
up towards the sky
I don't know words poetic enough for this

9/27/13

All By Elizabeth Azpurua

Languid Floating

My lips across her shoulder
taste her collar bone
her lashes spell out longing
and say "don't leave me alone"
Her hair is on my shoulder
it intertwines with mine
I fear I am dreaming
please don't give me a sign
I just want to hold her
nearer to me still
and wake with her come morning
laying there until
the words that I will whisper
remind her of our dream
where we were languid floating
in skin colored like cream

By: Elizabeth Azpurua

The Ones You Never Knew

He tells me I'm good lookin'
says he reads my poems
says he loves my hair
says he loves my arms
says he wants to hold me close
expounds upon my dreams
but really he just wants inside these seams

She tells me she loves me so
says she wants to get to know me
says she needs to spend more time
says she needs her family
she doesn't want the doors to close
for all her hopeful dreams
but really she just wants cash to buy her things

She says she's got my back forever
says she'll always stand by me
says no one can take my place
says she tells me everything
says she always wants to stay close
to fulfill all of her dreams
but she never quite says all that she means

He tells me I'm his truest friend
says he loves the weird I am
says he truly gets my life
in ways only that he can
says he will always stay close
still following my dreams
but all he really wants are carnal things

She says she loves me dearly now
says she stands up for my good
says she sees the best in me
saying she's done all she could
says she likes to stay real close
she believes in my dreams
but with a knife in my back shows what she means

He says I'm ever beautiful
says I am going to be his only
says he'll never stray again
he will prove this to me
he just wants to hold me close
to end up in my dreams
but all he wants are his hands beneath these seams

So, they want to strip me bare
and own me as their own
Or take all my money now
and everything I've known
Their knives are in my back
and their voices behind me, too
Saying what they will
while they're saying that they're true
But all I really know now
is what I always knew
The ones you let in close
are often the ones you never knew

Foreign

It seems that when I settled down to sleep, I would awake yet in a dream
for the faces I knew belong to foreign hearts and the contact I have is sparse
The ones who used to hold my hands now wave strange flags up high
with banners proclaiming foreign names saluting a foreign sky
The smiles are different, the laughter is fake, the tales are told not quite the same
and of me none remember, nor mention the truth that I am, now I am just a name
There's parades of fools marching with those who I loved in the streets
acting like clowns in bushels of idiocy wearing caped costumes of sheets
Where is the wisdom, the love and the empathy now blending into the crowd?
Where once there were hands to guide me along, now my hands aren't allowed
It seems that my sleeping has changed all my life when waking inside this hell
where the ones I once knew have foreign hearts and smiles and can't tell
who I am from the scenery and who I was from their lies

Fondest Dream

last night in dream i dreamt of birds
an albatross and friends
where with large wings they flew me high
over these mountains
and i thought it passing strange to me
to dream of birds here meant for the sea
and then recalled my fondest dream
to have the waves right next to me
for if I was a bird with wings
I'd fly from my mountains
and go in search of distant shores
and gather up my friends
and though be it passing strange to see
a flock of birds here meant for the sea
the truth be told my fondest dream
is to have the waves right next to me

Winter is Coming

"Winter"

Candles and lights and trees abound
and red ribbons tied 'round the street
with each little flake I am feeling
angels are falling on me
and they're whispering songs
as the greet me from heaven
and wrap me in arms of ice
Mistletoe clinging to branches up high
leaves me trying to reach toward the sky
I have faltered on ice and snow in the woods
while on the way to you
but Winter can't stop the warmth in my heart
whenever I think about you 

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"Coming"

It's coming.....20 days left they say
It's coming.....and the world will be done that day
So they say
So they say
But I am dreaming of touching your face
and hearing your laugh
and sharing your space
I am dreaming of being held by you
so the world is not ending, no, this isn't true
It's coming.....20 days left they say
It's coming.....and the world ends on that day
But they say
and they say
the craziest things
For nothing will stop all my dreams
I am dreaming of touching your face
and hearing your laugh
and sharing your space
I am dreaming of being held by you
The world will not end until this is true

12/1/12

Nonsense

ink stained hands dragging through locks
ruddy autumn hues of burnt orange
across a brow, a cheek, and capturing
freckles as you sleep
your breath smells like cardamom and sugar
and the sound of your heart beating
makes a tapping on my lattice work heart
while I relish in your dreaming
I will fall asleep in hemp and lavender
whilst you sleep in silk by me
my walls are stained with saffron
and your eyes are the color of juniper leaves
with skin like vanilla cotton on me
and my room is filled with incense and nonsense
like the shadows of our dreams
but my hands are stained in ink
from the sketching I was doing
while I watched you fall asleep

By Elizabeth Azpurua

Wealth of Coffins

"Tiny Coffins"

Take the items and pack them
tight, pack them small
and pack them all
Label them and stack them
high, stack them tall
just stack them all
and like tiny coffins inside a cemetery
you will line them up inside perfectly
and one by one you mark them off
and wait until you can
hold them again

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"Wealth of the Deep"

She longed for the sea like a bird longs for sky
and dreamed of the clouds as they'd roll by
as she'd sit on the shore and sing to herself
of the boundless wealth of the deep
She longed for the sea like a mermaid would
wishing for a home near the waves if she could
and soothed herself just to dream of the day
she'd dive into the wealth of the deep

11/2/12

Living Mind

"Get Back to Living"

No remedy in sight for this, but broken shambles in my fists
You're insecure and I am afraid
What we have isn't so safe

There's ions of time to spend on this and I am incapable of it
The times I made inside my bed
I unraveled in dread

So take my weary heart and make it beat again
and break open my deep shut eyes
So I will see again
and wither away my walls I built to keep them out
and take me over the edges
and break me out
I am waiting to get back to living
but this trying not to is debilitating

No reason for my battle waged against the world of hope
I was insecure and I was afraid
for where was love ever safe?

There's mountains out of my molehills and I can't cope
What does a girl like me feel
when nothing feels real?

So take my weary heart and make it beat again
and break open my deep shut eyes
So I will see again
and wither away my walls I built to keep them out
and take me over the edges
and break me out
I am waiting to get back to living
but this trying not to is debilitating

I just want to breathe and I want to leave
and I want to scrub off my harder edges
and erase the stains and break off the chains
and tear down these unwelcoming ledges

You're insecure and I'm afraid
What we have isn't so safe
but I want to try to try to live again
because not trying is not working, and
Take my weary heart and make it beat again
and break open my deep shut eyes
So I will see again
and wither away my walls I built to keep them out
and take me over the edges
and break me out
I am waiting to get back to living
but this trying not to is debilitating

by elizabeth azpurua

10/6/12

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"My Mind"

I know my thoughts are not your thoughts
and my mind plays different tunes
My dreams have been unraveling
and I wonder often if yours do
I know my days don't go like yours
and there are ways to make this better
My time is spent differently than you
and I think perhaps if you could ever
see things the way I do
maybe you'd know why I think like I do
I know my memories are not the same as yours
and my mind is a maze of metaphors
My dreams are nightmarish and complex
and I know you don't care what they're for
But if you could live like I live just for a day
You might understand the tune my mind plays
And if you could wake up and in this bed of mine
Perhaps you'd understand the ways of my mind

10/4/12

The Fall of Rome

Take my fragile bony hands and lead me into the dark
and with me dance across this floor
like it is Central Park
and when I awake from this dream tear out my heart
and with it stitch my insides up
like macabre art
I want to hear your lullaby whispered in my ear
before you close them off
whisper softly Dear
When I am buried in the earth behind your home
remember the dance we shared
the fall of Rome
I want you to carry my hollow soul underneath your tongue
where each time you say my name
or air escapes a lung
You will remember my bony hands in a darkened room
where we danced across the floor
before I met my doom

by: elizabeth

Pale Wolf

"Wolf looks like a Sheep"

You might look like a sheep
but inside is something
of a predatory sort
A wolf, to ravish me
all done in sport
and while I'm asleep
you will stroke my hair,
and wait for my waking
You, wolf, take care
in primal undertaking
My body is not your game
but your reward

9/13/12

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"Pale"

I often dream of pale hands
and dark masks
while wrestling my sheets
for they seem to pin me to
my bed
Like a spider's web I am
trapped
forever bound in this reality
and unable to awake in
the realm of dreams
where pale hands
undo me

9/12/12

By Elizabeth Azpurua

Weeds Grow Underfoot

"Grow"

have I fallen down?
and drug beneath the earth, my soul is crawling
crawling towards you
and the rubble settles
and on me, thick, layered dust; I'm doomed
but still, I crawl towards you
and I dig my way out, and up and out
and greeting me
is sun
and the light is all and all I know is
you're the one
I'd fallen down
and learned beneath the earth, my soul is yearning
yearning only for you
and when this settles
the dust on me, thick, and heavy; I was doomed
until I learned to crawl to you
and I dug my way out, and up and out
and greeting me
is sun
and the light is all and all I know is
you're the one
you're the one
to help me.......grow

9/6/12

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"Weeds"

and thou art like a high walled garden
  where inside the weeds have grown
and I am like the bird that visits
  unable to tend, or mend, or sow
and when the rains come I must seek shelter
  and when the snow falls I must be warm
but when your flowers bloom I am here
and when your flowers die I am here
  and what they call weeds, I call home

9/5/12

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"Underfoot"

in tiny threads, stories were hidden
and then placed under the bed
in a rug
and those tiny threads lay unbidden
screaming truth for your head
in your dreams
and woven like cathedrals
in the carpet
was the truth you refused to think
and underfoot you left it
and it surfaced in your dreams
in tiny threads, it lay seeking
and under your bed
the truth
and those tiny threads speaking
screaming truth for your head
to prove
and woven like cathedrals
in the carpet
was the reason you won't think
and underfoot you left them
until they battled in your dreams

9/6/12