I Used to Be an Angel in a Meadow

"Not An Angel Anymore"

broke my wings off
and tucked them in the corner
you thought i wouldn't notice
and that i would stay on the ground
bound
took my halo away
and placed it in the dresser
thought i wouldn't notice
in my reflection my glow is gone
forgotten
you slowly wove me into a sickly figure
no wings, no halo, not an angel anymore
you took my harp and my voice
and gave me a hole in which to stay
here i thought i had found a new life of freedom
but i only gave up my purpose to condone yours
i'm not now
so what's next?

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"Who I Used To Be"

I used to wait by the door and by the windows
I wished on blue moons and stars and willows
I collected thoughts and dreams and hopes and years
I counted signs and trees and reasons in shapes of tears
Maybe I was broken
Maybe I am a fool
But I knew who I was, didn't I?
I played in dreams and painted things I held to
I wrote out my screams and wished for truth
Now I dart back and forth to your upbeat tempo
I still try to spin the way you want me to
I really just want to curl beside this rock here
and pretend that this planet is another sphere
Maybe I am broken
I might be a fool
But I know who I was once upon a time
If I wanna dance upon the edge of evil to claim the right, I shall
If I want to play the music of the fools to bring them wisdom, I will
If I feel the power in my palms at the sight of his face I'll feel a thrill
and if it scares you than I will keep walking along this path, I shall
Maybe I am broken
I'll remember one day
Until then I'll remain this shell of secrets, reasons, hopes and dreams
Of unshared thoughts, wishes, needs and silenced screams
I'll wait by my windows and by my doors
I'll count the signs and number the floors
I'll banish the nonsense while fighting the impossibilities
and when you call me a fool I'll recall one thing
I know who I need to be
and I know who I was


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"Meadow of Yellows"

it's a cloak, a guard
and a shield, said he
a promise never kept
and I'm in this place waiting
with a city light loft
and wishing for that
castle on the hill
that cliff on the edge
a meadow of yellows
and a memory of love
it's a cloak, a guard
and a shield, said he
but he never came back for me
he never came back for me
he never came back for me
and I can't find the place
that space
Before that girl and her vampire friend
I had a meadow of yellows near a cliff
and far below there was a sea
but I'm not sure where this place could be
and he never came back for me
it's a cloak, a guard
and a shield, said he
a promise never kept
and I'm still waiting
it's a lost key, a lost map
a lost time
and a lie
he never came back for me

All by Elizabeth Azpurua 3/25/11